Remember the Satisfyer Multifun toys I reviewed recently? They didn’t really work for me, but I didn’t think they were all that bad. My fellow sex bloggers hated them, which goes to show how different we all are.
I didn’t like them, though, so I asked Satisfyer to send me the Satisfyer Pro 3 Vibration. Instead, they sent me a box of vibrators. There was a lot of moaning on Twitter from sex toy reviewers about receiving an unsolicited box of vibrators followed by a lot of moaning from new sex toy reviewers that they would love to get their hands on some free vibrators to review, so I have offered to send 5 off to new bloggers. The links to their reviews will be added below. I also refer you to my recent post on the work sex toy reviewers do if you find yourself agreeing that sex toy reviewers shouldn’t complain about receiving unsolicited toys.
I decided to test and review two of the toys as I turned one of them on and realised that this time, Satisfyer had not messed up the vibrations. So I thought I’d try out the smaller vibrators, starting with the Satisfyer Vibes Charming Smile.
What I thought I would like about the Satisfyer Vibes Charming Smile is that it’s on the smaller side, with a raised bit at the end for G spot stimulation. As someone who doesn’t really like anything inside other than my husband’s penis (no judgement, I simply don’t like penetration), I thought this one would be the least annoying. Boy, was I wrong.
The toy is not as bad as the Multifun rings, which really didn’t do anything for me. At least this one had good vibes. I also liked the fact that you can scroll up and down through the settings, which is great when you, like me, don’t like the patterns, so you don’t have to fear accidentally straying into pattern territory. If you go too far past the speeds, just back up quickly.
I like the fact that the vibrator is rechargable and fully waterproof. This means you don’t have to worry about running out of batteries (although when travelling you need to remember to bring your charging cable) and you can clean it in the sink with hot water and soap (my preferred method of cleaning). I also really like the ring-shaped handle of the vibrator. It makes it so much easier to hold and manoeuvre the toy.
The buttons are easy to operate, it’s quite instinctive really and you don’t have to look for how to press them, which is always good. You don’t really want any distractions while you’re trying to get yourself off.
So, what did I not like about it? I did not like the fact that it was just very uncomfortable, bordering on painful, when inserted. I tried this out with my husband in the room and he looked over and said, “What are you doing? You look like you’re in pain.” And, reader, I was. The ridge that was supposed to helpfully stimulate my G-spot was rubbing everywhere but my G-spot. Even when I finally managed to connect it in the right place, it still didn’t make me feel good. A sex toy is supposed to give you pleasure, not pain. At least, not pain like that.
I ended up ditching the toy in favour of one I knew would get me off, but I had pain in my vagina for days after. It is possible that you may love this toy and it hits you in the right places. I can only speak for myself. I am never going to use this toy again.
If you are willing to spend $49.95 on this toy, please consider doing so at Betty’s Toy Box so I can receive a small commission.