May is Masturbation Month and we are already 7 days into this month. Sometimes I can’t believe how much time flies. It seemed like only yesterday I joined the #30dayOrgasmFun challenge, which started at the beginning of April and which I didn’t do too well at. It seems like since my sex toy reviews have dwindled, my masturbation practices have dwindled with it.
And now it’s Masturbation Month, a month in which I planned to keep going with the orgasm challenge. And while I have had partnered sex, I have not really taken much time for myself. I don’t tend to masturbate a lot anyhow when I am at home, as hubby is generally able and willing to satisfy me, but I had planned to take more time for myself. Masturbation is about more than just getting an orgasm, it’s time for me to reconnect with myself.
I am terrible at self care. Absolutely terrible. I tend to put the needs of my family (my husband and kids) before my own. And this has been far worse lately. We are a person down at work, which means that I have to work longer hours and skip my lunch break. Which means I don’t have time to write during my lunch. In the evening my kids need me for homework and now that we have bought the Dungeons and Dragons supplies, the weekends have been taken up with playing D&D. Which is a lot of fun, but it means less time for me personally.
My blogging has dwindled as a result and so has my novel writing. I used to write during part of the weekend, but today is the only time in weeks when I have had a chance to sit down and push out a few blog posts. I was forced to put my foot down as I will be on holiday for the rest of the week with little to no access to internet, so I need to schedule my blog posts in advance.
All this has led to a rise in stress levels and although my libido hasn’t waned, my energy levels are not keeping pace. When the kids are finally settled in bed, I am too tired for anything other than roll into bed and go to sleep. If I do have enough energy for sexual activity, I do so with my husband, as I am limited to the amount of sexual activity I can handle at the moment, so I don’t want to use up this energy for masturbation as I still prefer sex with hubby over masturbating.
I know that if I take time out for myself to write smut, crank out a few blog posts and have a few good wanks, my energy levels will rise and I will feel a lot better. The first week of the #30DayOrgasmFun showed me that already. So I need to get my head around that. I need to carve out a bit more time for myself, whether for writing, masturbating or just reading a book and drinking a glass of wine. It is easy to lose yourself in life completely and for me, I am bad at saying no, but we all know how bad it is for your health to slack on self care.
Just sitting here at my new desk, writing this blog post from the heart makes me feel a lot happier. When I go down the path of no self care, everything looks too difficult, like a huge mountain I need to scale. I become paralysed at the thought of writing blog posts – putting too much pressure on myself. Sure, this post is probably not the most sexy or even coherent post I have ever written, but I am writing it. And I am enjoying it.
Why is it always the fun things that slide when I get busy and stressed? Wouldn’t it be better if I told work “sorry, I am very stressed, I am going to leave early today and have a nice, long bath”? Somehow I don’t think my boss would be too pleased with that. But things need to change, as I need a bit more creative joy in my life. And with the Summer 100 Sex Blogger’s Challenge around the corner, I need to get into the groove of writing regularly again. Those 100 blog posts aren’t going to write themselves (not that I will be able to do 100, but I will aim at writing as much as possible).
Not saying that my life is going to change drastically – sometimes life just overwhelms you and you need to go into self-preservation mode – but I am going to take more time for myself. When I take time for myself with writing (especially writing smut), I feel more energised and I can do both partnered sex AND masturbation. I have to remember that masturbating does not have to take a long time. Masturbation month is the perfect time to reconnect with that part of myself, and 5 minutes of self care a day is better than an hour of self care once a month, right? And this increased self care will get me back on track to where I want to be.
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