How the latest sexual harassment allegations helped me recognise my own gaslighting

Sexual harassment seems to be a hot topic these days. Allegations of sexual misconduct have been brought out against Harvey Weinstein, Roy Moore and Louis CK, to name a few, and here in the UK we have seen our own spate of sexual harassment claims against members of parliament. As a consequence, Twitter has exploded with women coming forward to tell their own – often harrowing – tales of sexual harassment, particularly under the hashtag #MeToo. Continue reading “How the latest sexual harassment allegations helped me recognise my own gaslighting”

Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of

It seems like I talk about masturbation a lot, both here and on Twitter. But I think masturbation is important, for a number of reasons. Obviously, as a sex blogger I am sometimes required to masturbate when I test out sex toys to review (oh, the hardship!). As I said in an earlier post, I have probably masturbated more in the last year than I have in the 19 years previously. Continue reading “Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of”

We are all different: why body positivity makes common sense

A while ago I was sat on the couch, reading a book, minding my own business. My 8 year old son sat next to me, poked me in the stomach and said, ‘You need to lose weight, you are fat.’

I was aghast. Aside from the fact that, while I have gained a bit more weight in the last year, I am by no means fat, it’s not his place to say I need to lose weight. And so I told him that he was being judgemental and I didn’t need to lose weight.
Continue reading “We are all different: why body positivity makes common sense”

Not everything women do is for the benefit of men


I love wearing high heels. Not so much when I am out and about shopping, for example, or walking home, but when I am in the office or the rare occasion I am going out, I like to put on a high, preferably strappy, heel. I love the way heels give me confidence and I love how much taller I am in them (I am a shorty without heels). My manager, who prefers practical, low heeled shoes, once commented on my choice of footwear.
‘I would never wear heels like that in the office,’ she said. ‘There is just no one at work I feel the need to impress.’ Continue reading “Not everything women do is for the benefit of men”

The importance of enthusiastic consent

I wrote a post about consent which was lost in the big website disaster, but it’s such an important topic, I am rewriting it. TW: rape, sexual assault.

Consent
Let’s talk about consent. I am not sure why it is such a difficult concept for people to understand, but it seems that the message still isn’t clear, which is why I am going to talk about it today. Continue reading “The importance of enthusiastic consent”

Monogamous sex blogger: contradiction in terms?


When I started my sex blog, I did not know many other sex bloggers. I initially started my blog to have a place to post my erotic short stories and to muse about sex in general. I didn’t even consider myself a sex blogger. It wasn’t until I started doing the Summer 100 Sex Blogger Challenge that I got to know other sex bloggers and I started to get a bit self conscious when I read their blogs. Continue reading “Monogamous sex blogger: contradiction in terms?”

The challenges of sex blogging as a mum


Sex blogging is fun. So much fun. I love testing sex toys and learning more about what I like in my toys, and I love talking about sex in general. The sex blogging community is also amazing, both through blogs and social media (in my case, Twitter). But being a sex blogging mum is not without its challenges. Continue reading “The challenges of sex blogging as a mum”